The willful child

When Leif was about 6 months old his daycare teacher started telling me he would give us a run for our money. She called him her "willful charmer". An evil mix. When I took Leif back to daycare on Tuesday they told me how quiet it was last week, no Leif to remove from the walls. But towards the end of the week they realized how much they missed him, no Leif dancing on the tables. My willful charmer.

I don't see this crazed "I will do this and you can't stop me" look in the other kid's eyes. According to Leif's daycare - and I see this too, traditional disciplinary tactics don't work. You can remove him from the table all you want and tell him "no we don't walk on the tables" and redirect him. But the next thing you know he is TRYING to get your attention while walking on the table. "Hello, I am doing something I shouldn't do, come remove me so I can do it again. It is such a FUN game!"

Plain screaming, as I found out this morning, doesn't work either. I am not a screamer, I am a crier. So why I felt the need to scream at the top of my lungs after 15 minutes of attempts to put him in his carseat so we could go to daycare/work, I have no idea. I screamed. Leif stopped, looked at me and smiled his charming smile and persisted in making body stiff as board while flipping the hips and sliding out of his coat (then sweather and shirt). I physically could not get him in his carseat. Redirection? Yeah, right. This kid has focus.

Everyday is different, there is no predicting his responses. The other day to get the teeth brushed I pinned him beneath me, Hans held down his arms and I pried my finger in his mouth (while he bit down - hard) and scrubbed his teeth, quickly. This morning? I couldn't get the toothbrush out of his hands. This wouldn't be so bad, he can take the dang toothbrush to daycare, but he wouldn't leave the bathroom vanity. Why? Because he had to be lifted up to spit and rinse his toothbrush 32 times. Teeth, very clean. Not something I want to discourage lest we end up with the pinning experience more often, but after 8 minutes of brushing, spitting and rinsing, we.have.to.go.

Just when you think you have reached your limit, he turns and gives you that smile for a little bit, puckers up his lips for a kiss, wraps his arms around my neck and squeezes, then runs off to the next challenge.

I wouldn't have it any other way. I love him with all my heart, willfulness and charming qualities included. Someday I will be able to effectively communicate and reason with him about why we don't need to brush our teeth for 10 minutes, why we do need to get into the carseat, why we need to get out of the bath, have his diaper changed, change clothes, not throw things at the dog... won't I? He will understand one day, won't he? And I will look back on these days when he was little and have completely forgotten about how he tries me somedays.

Which then raises the question... I can't possibly end up with a second child with the same personality, can I? Memo to self... no sex during October... cannot conceive another Leo.