Thursday, May 12, 2016

Well babies

Ok. So neither are babies anymore. But I finally got around to the well child exams for Silas and Skadi. Well child visits are my favorite. Our Doctor talks to the kids as adults and the responses are often hilarious. 

Silas: "What is she doing to me?"
Me: "The nurse is taking your blood pressure."
Silas: "Oh. Ok." (Nurse finishes.) "Are you happy now?"
Nurse: "Umm yes."
Silas: "Did you suck all my bones away?" 
Nurse: (Laughs) "Umm no."
Silas: "Yeah, ok. I can still feel my bones in my elbows and knees. I guess you are ok now."
She enters the information into the computer.
Nurse: "Ok, just a few questions. Does he know his name?"
I just looked at her blankly for a minute.
Me: "Yes, he knows his name."
Nurse: "Does he speak in complete sentences?" 
Me: "Well..." (Pause.)
Nurse: "Ok, so he did to me, so I am guessing that's normal."
Me: "That and more."
And Skadi is busting up laughing. 

Doctor: "Silas, what do you like to eat?"
Silas: "Cheese."
Doctor: "Anything else?"
Silas: "Yogurt."
Doctor: "Anything else?" 
Silas: "Cheese."
Doctor looks at me.
Me: "He speaks the truth."
Doctor: "Silas what is your favorite thing for breakfast."
Silas: "Most definitely pizza."
WTF? The child has never had pizza for breakfast in his life.

Doctor: "Skadi what is your favorite thing for breakfast?"
Skadi: "Captain Crunch with CRUNCH BERRIES!"
WTF? I buy Captain Cruch ONCE in a moment of weakness. Trying to appease Silas at the grocery store so I can finish getting groceries and now it bites me in the butt! She thinks I give my kids pizza and sugar cereals for breakfast. GAHHH!!

Skadi grew two inches last year and remains in the 26th percentile for both height and weight. 

Silas was 32 lbs and 38.5". About 50-60th percentile for both. He's a lightweight because he eats nothing. Nothing but mango nectar, cheese and yogurt. I need to compare stats, but I am sure he is lighter than both the other two, but height is a forgotten unknown for me. I am pretty sure Leif was taller. Probably not Skadi though at age 3. She was starting to show her shrimpiness at that point. 

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