Remembering back to rabbit's feet

Do you remember when they were somewhat popular? Rabbit's feet? Colored in wacky colors?

When I was in elementary school they held a Christmas shop in the library where kids could go and buy their little goodies on their own. Rabbit's feet were all the rage.

And that year my parents each were lucky enough to get one each from me.

I think back to the rabbit's feet when I look at the presents my kids got me and I am very thankful that they aren't all the rage anymore.

Actually, they are pretty gross... and I remember that my dog ate more than one...

AB and I have a routine whereby we take the kids shopping and let them pick out whatever they want (within reason) to each of us. And the kids love having picked out and wrapped their own gifts.

Skadi is a good little shopper. But she goes into a store with no preconceived notion about what she is buying for anyone. She likes to browse. She found a nice big brown fuzzy blanket for AB and also a Muppet's t-shirt. Slippers and socks for Aunt Tara.

Leif on the other hand, knows exactly what he wants to get someone and goes in headstrong and unwilling to waver! He insisted on an Angry Birds shirt for AB and also a scarf.

We went to about four different stores in search of the right scarf. So many were "too girly for daddy". But he finally found a green and grey thick wool scarf that by the time we found it I was willing to pay a little more lest we have to go to anymore stores.

For me?

I was the lucky recipient of two tubes of sparkley red and pink lip gloss AND a bottle of green sparkle body mist in case I decide to try out for Elphaba I suppose. I am sure you can guess who gave those to me.

From Leif, I got a crystal duck and a crystal pillar that says "Mom, I love you" and has its own rotating and colored lights base reminiscent of a small disco ball.

AB had a bit of a hard time keeping a straight face as I opened it and Leif looked on beaming with a huge smile.

I asked Leif how he came up with those ideas and he told me that he remembered back to when he got me a bead for my bracelet and how much I liked it and he KNEW that I would love to have a glass duck because of that. Okaaayyyy...

Later on AB told me that he was perplexed when Leif announced that he had to get me a glass duck for Christmas. Maybe I had it easy searching the stores for the "right" scarf? Then he asked me what I thought of the crystal pillar?

"I love it because Leif loves it and it is important to him," I told him.

And secretly I was thinking "AND because it isn't a rabbit's foot!"

Now THAT'S customer service!

AB told me when he ordered my earrings online from Sundance catalog (one of my favorite online sites... though I can never justify buying the stuff for myself) that something weird happened when he checked out. AB never orders online and I figured he was just being a goof. He told me he got two order confirmations and two different shipping tracking numbers.

A few days later he evidently got a note that one order was return shipped by UPS to Sundance as it was sent out in error. AB never had to do anything.

Yesterday in the mail he got a letter of apology from the company for the confusion as well as a $50 gift card! Robert Redford is a very generous man.

I asked AB immediately exactly how expensive my earrings were?

$27 he told me.

Guess who's going shopping! (And if anyone is looking for a great company to buy gifts from, check out Sundance.)

Insert title here

I have no words for a title. Because right now I am just mad. I am ticked and I am hurt.

I got an e-mail from my sister in law saying that they don't like materialism and being that it "isn't fair" that we all have to buy for each of their three kids, they don't want it to continue this way. They have set up a new gift exchange routine that is just plain complicated, but essentially says who we will buy for with a strict amount. No draw. Oh and we will all buy for AB's sister... the one who the last two of the three years of the exchanges hasn't actually participated for some unknown reason. (She had AB each time, so I know this for certain.) But since she has no kids we are to shower her with gifts instead. How nice for her.

I hate that my kids don't know their cousins. But this is just another way to drive a wedge between already very distant cousins. "Sorry Leif, we aren't buying for those cousins. Oh and the one we are buying for, you won't receive anything from." No, I wouldn't say that. But do the kids all understand the dynamics of the exchanges? I am not sure I understand them.

As usual, I am the big stick in the mud that sent a big stick in the mud e-mail. I am on the bottom rung of daughter in laws, there is no place further to fall. I may as well tick off my mother in laws "best friend" (my SIL, aka the perfect mother).

Part of my job as a parent is to counter materialism with real parenting. It is also to teach my child that Christmas is not just about receiving, but it is also about giving and choosing items for people that are what THEY would like, and not what my son would like. And when receiving is involved since that is an inevitability (a joyous unevitibility for all kids out there) how to be a gracious recipient and to politely acknowledge the gift and the generosity of the giver.

On Thursday on the way home Leif told me he wanted to get N a surprise. We talked about this since his first suggestion was that he wanted to buy her Colorado. (Wondering if it is really... color yellow?) We decided after we talked about the logistics of "giving" Colorado, that he would give N a book, "Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus". It is his favorite book and we just so happened to have a spare copy put up on a shelf as a Christmas gift for someone else (oh maybe a cousin I am no longer supposed to buy for?) He very excitedly picked out a gift bag and a big green bow to put on it. He was proud to take it to her. She said thank you and Leif was happy. He talked about giving her the book a few times this evening.

Then tonight we went to sit down to read books before bed. I asked Leif if he wanted to read the Pigeon book. He told me, "but I gave my favorite book to N", in an almost matter of fact way.

"No Leif," I told him, "you gave her a copy of the same book. See you still have the book too! You didn't give her your book." I pulled out his copy to his complete astonishment.

"Oh!" he told me excitedly. "Then let's read that one and probably N's mommy is reading her the pigeon book too right now."

I had tears in my eyes. I was so proud of him. My son did that well all the time thinking he was giving the one and only copy of his favorite book away. Even when it was time to read it, he accepted he had gifted it to someone else very matter of fact.

I do believe *I* am doing the right thing with my son.