Privacy? What's that?

We seem to have a bit of an issue in our house.

Modesty.

A lack of modesty.

I keep hearing that just one day the kids will want their door closed, they will close the door when they use the restroom and they won't run around naked. I ask Leif if he closes the door to the bathroom at school knowing that it is up to each kid, "sometimes", he tells me, "when someone tells me to."

Typical, oblivious little Leif.

My son is going on 5.5 and it hasn't happened. He desires no privacy.

It isn't like AB and I are hippy parents. Our parents weren't nudists, we weren't raised in the buff.

You may have noticed pictures of my daughter in the blog... she starts out the day in one outfit, changes a few times to suit her mood and then finally mid-afternoon has had it with clothes and runs around in her panties... if we are lucky and can convince her to keep those on.

I leave our bedroom and bathroom door open on weekday mornings since while the kids sleep, I work out and then shower. They come in when they wake up and tell me they are up (me in various states of dress or undress), then they crawl in the bed and watch whatever happens to be on the little TV. I don't lock my door. My son sees me nude, but it's no big deal to him. Will it be at some point? Or will it just become a big deal to me?

Leif is better about keeping his clothes on than his sister, but he is often seen carrying his clothes to a particular place in the house to get dressed - to be near whoever.

Our friends' daughter (age 6) spent the night a few weeks ago while her parents went to a nice wine and food dinner. At one point she told Leif, "I need some privacy". And Leif wasn't joking when he said, "what's that?"

She had her pajamas on when Leif walks in naked, carrying his pajamas to get dressed near everyone else.

Giggles erupted!

I quickly directed him back to his room to get dressed. Oblivious-ness set in again, "I just want to get dressed where I can talk!"

See Leif and Skadi also still bathe together at 5.5 and 3. We have tried for the last six or so months to split them up. We have tried alternating bath nights, we have tried consecutive baths, we have put them in different bathrooms. Somehow they migrate together. If it is Skadi's bath night, then she is begging Leif to get in and play mermaids with her and he is all too willing. If it is Leif's bath night then we are physically restraining Skadi and locking her out so that she doesn't get in with him.

Which is less healthy?

Within a day or so we give up these attempts and let them go back to their baths together where they play and laugh and blow bubbles and see who can float the longest.

I am waiting for that day that Leif requests privacy... though right now I am thinking Skadi might reach that milestone first, given history.

Then again, maybe not, and maybe we are just hippy nudist parents.

(Oh goodness, wonder who is going to be directed to my blog now with keyword searches...)

When the halo is present...

I whine a fair amount about my crazy little redhead. How her moods change with the wind... How she has yet to routinely sleep through the night... How she was *that* kid in daycare for some time... And occasionally regresses back there... How completely emotional she is... And totally irrational...

But there is a side of her that not many people see.

The side when the halo is centered perfectly over her head and nothing buy pure joy radiates. Those days - as she approaches age three - are becoming a wee bit more common.

I got a beautiful bracelet for Christmas and Skadi is still quite proud of it. Daily she comes in and asks if I have my bracelet and not only that, but then she helps me put it on.

These bracelets aren't the easiest things to put on even if you aren't a klutz. Skadi very meticulously brings the end around and sticks it ever so perfectly in the clasp end. She is amazingly patient with it. Her tiny fingers are perfect at the task and she decreases the time it takes me to get the bracelet on by at least two thirds.

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I complained the other day to AB that I haven't been taking enough food to work with me. I am usually starved by the late afternoon. Skadi has decided to do something about this and recently every morning while picking out the after school snacks that go in my bag (that VargasGirrl made me that is the perfect size and shape for all the stuff I haul to work and daycare outside my purse), she has also grabbed me a granola bar and puts it in my purse.

"For you mommy," she tells me.

And wow that granola bar has been my saviour lately.

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This evening we were playing Skadi's favorite game - hide and seek. She loves to play in teams. Normally it is she and daddy against Leif and me. But this evening we changed it up and I got to hide with her in her favorite ever hiding spot - under the covers on my and AB's bed. She got the giggles, which made me giggle. But I finally got her to be quiet.

In a hushed voice she says, "mommy?"

"Yes Skadi?" I whisper back.

"I think you are beautiful," she whispers.

Talk about melt my heart!

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Skadi is also an incredibly compassionate little girl. In fact, her teacher at daycare has marvelled about this. When a child is hurt, Skadi is the first one there saying, "you okay?" and offering an icey. This happens at home too. When I recently crushed my toe, Skadi was the one there patting my back and bringing my iceys.

Differences

When Leif was 2 years and 4 months we moved him into a twin sized bed. In order to entice him, my mom bought him Nemo sheets for his new bed since he was HUGE into "Finding Nemo".

We put the sheets on and I remember him being happy. But more of a happy like, "oh look someone put material with Nemo painted on it onto my pillow, neat."

(Nothing like the skis today.)

I was shopping at Target and found a set of Dora twin sheets on sale for $10 and grabbed them. Skadi doesn't have a twin yet, she is sleeping in the queen sized bed in her room. Because all second children get to do things earlier and get bigger, better things.

Ok, so the doing things earlier part is generally true. But she will be getting a twin bed when we move.

I washed the pillowcase and threw it on her pillow.

"DOWA!!!" She squealed. "DOWA PILLOW!" She pointed repeatedly to Dora.

Then she took her pillow and layed on it in the middle of the floor and slid around the floor. Praised Dora a little more and then hauled her new prized possession off.

Leif is a pretty even keeled kid. He is happy go lucky most of the time with a few dips and a few peaks. His dips don't last long and he quickly returns to his happy kid place.

Skadi has mood swings like a pendulum. She is way way up and way way down. I asked my mom if she got this from me - was I a moody little red haired girl?

Short answer? No.

Time to blame my husband's side of the family!

The other child

So many of my recent blogs have been about Leif. Yes, I do have another child, a girl child, named Skadi.

She will be two in about a month and a half and has fully embraced the terrible two's.

I fear this is one of those times when I said repeatedly that the terrible two's didn't exist for Leif and that I didn't know where that statement came from - that karma is biting me hard. We will see what happens when Skadi hits two officially. I might be pleasantly surprised. Or not.

Skadi is at that funny stage where she is developing her own statements and mannerisms. She has this way with telling you something very important where she opens her eyes wide and nods her head as she tells you as if it is the most important thing she will ever say. And it is too freaking adorable.

She has a few trademarked statements, one that has stuck with the.entire.family.

"NNnnnnnnnnnnO!" You have to really string out the "nnnn" part (for about three full seconds) and then a short but loud "O".

This is most often used in conjunction with another word.

"Weif".

"NnnnnnnnnnnnnO Weif!" is the most common phrase to hear leave her little lips. And she has to point her finger and shake it when she says it.

None of us can say no normally anymore.

There are two other words that she utters regularly:

Elmo. This one she has down pat and has for some time. She loves the furry red monster and for some reason even likes the mime's Mr Noodle and his brother Mr. Noodle. She regularly laughs at them and sighs, "Mr. Nooooodo!"

The other one is a new one - DoWa.

Leif kind of lived in his own world and didn't soak up much from other kids his age were into for a long time. I did say he used to right - because this isn't the case now. Leif went OCD with Curious George for well over a year. Before that it was Nemo. Then Monsters. He would watch one thing and one thing only forever, repeats and all. Then one day he would be done with it. And his preferences never had a bit to do with what other kids liked.

Skadi is a different beast. I put a Disney Princesses t-shirt on her that she received from family friends for Christmas. She actually smiled once the shirt was on her, pointed to her belly and said, "Princess shirt!" I didn't know she knew princesses.

Same thing with DoWa. Leif was playing Deigo and Dora games on NickJr the other day. Skadi walked up and quite loudly squealed, "DOWA!!"

So apparently she likes Dora. Leif has some competition for his TV time (finally) - maybe there will exist some balance with Transformers.

(Transformers, more than meets the eye. Transformers robots in disguise. Autobots rage their battle to destroy the evil forces of the decepticon! Transformers!)

Ch-ch-ch-changes

My kids are changing everyday, and while it can be fun to watch, it is also scary to see time flying so quickly.

Leif asked me to measure him the other day. So we went over to the wall with tick marks and names and dates, he backed up against it and my jaw dropped open. I have trouble carrying him now. He normally wears one size an entire year - he shouldn't be growing out of his size 4's yet. I shouldn't be buying size 5/6 pajamas yet? Then I looked at where his new tick mark was - a good five inches above the one from July 6th. He is a few inches shy of four feet tall.

Leif has an extensive vocabulary (tonight he used the word "interactive"), he is learning new games (we played both Charades and I Spy last night - now really... shouldn't an "eagle" fall into the same category as a "bird" when playing Charades?) and he has started learning to read at school now that he has mastered his letter sounds.

Since moving to his new room Leif has settled down, become friendlier with kids, is keeper and enforcer of "the rules", and has hit a stride academically. The teachers have identified what he likes for rewards - afternoon visits to Rainbow Room to see his good friend, N. He was particularly proud of himself the other day when he told me that he had his third straight day of visiting Rainbow Room for good behavior. And I know his room well enough to know that this has to be STELLAR behavior from him to warrant the reward.

I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Leif still has "issues" with listening - though his very observant head teacher is pretty sure that it isn't willful defiance or him simply ignoring or deciding it isn't what he wants to do. Instead she has pointed out a few cues that are indicative that he is a visual learner and that to help him to learn we just need to modify the way we teach him a little. She explained to me that Leif is more than willing to do what she shows him and will master things very quickly, however has a lot of trouble processing being told what to do. She went on to classify him as "extremely intelligent" and expects him to be fully reading in a few months.

I keep thinking back to when Leif was Skadi's age (20 months) and AB and I found out we were expecting another baby. Yeah, so not going down that road right now. Our life is busy enough as is!

And I am enjoying my sleep.

Did you read that? Sleep!!

*Knocking on wood.*

The last two nights Skadi has slept through the night (well until 5am) in her crib. And total that is 3 of the 4 last nights she has slept through the night. We are on a good track here... just in time to totally mess her up by flying and staying in a new house on an air mattress. Wouldn't it figure?

I will be optimistic though. Here's hoping that she decides she LIKES sleeping through the night and does at my mom's house and then gets up and hangs out with grandma and Bompa giving mommy and daddy some extra snooze time!!

Skadi is such a different creature than Leif. I say that and then think of all the things that are very similar with the two of them.

One thing that warms my heart is seeing my kids interact. Skadi loves copying Leif and doing what he does. Last night while he was watching a movie, she crawled up on the couch and layed on him, wrapped her arms around his neck and planted a big wet kiss on his lips. Seeing Leif wrap his arms around her without saying a word and kiss her back on her cheek warmed my heart and brought tears to my eyes. I hope that they will always have a close friendship.

Skadi is mastering more words and has this week learned a very important words, "cupcake". And she prefers chocolate.

Skadi asks for pancakes, she calls Winny, she requests particular "jammies" and will ask for Mahna Mahna whenever she sees me on the computer. She plays lightsabers and swords with Leif or will sit by herself playing Little People. She loves to go outside and really enjoys our evening walks. She has a distinct opinion on what should be on TV (Elmo) though she can't seem to make the time to actually sit and watch on Elmo DVD all the way through, which thrills Leif to pieces.

*Click*

My mom used to always say my sister and I did it on purpose, we liked opposite things just to annoy her. If my sister liked pickles, I didn't (and still don't). If I like mushrooms, she did not. The list goes on... and on and on.

Evidence that this was not purposeful (beyond just saying it) can be seen with my kids. My kids aren't old enough to make decisions to be different from the other. And in fact, the are at that age where they more often strive to be the same. However, Leif (my once self declared vegetarian who now eats a little meat and chicken in addition to his beloved salami that he never surrendered) since he started on solids loved fruits, vegetables and carbs. Skadi, on the other hand, is a protein girl. The one thing they agree on though is rice. Rice, rice and more rice for my kids.

Leif still loves his fruit and vegetables. I am not bragging that he asks for fruit for every snack. Because he also asks for it at every meal. We plow through a lot of fruit and have had no problems getting rid of fruit from our fruit trees and raspberry canes this year.

Skadi makes awful faces and refuses fruit in all forms except for bananas and canned peaches. All summer I have worked to get a fresh raspberry into her mouth to no avail.

We went on a walk this afternoon and AB stuck a few plums in his pocket from the tree. He handed Leif and I each one on the walk and we immediately started into them. Skadi looked at us like she was completely left out.

AB handed her one and I waited for her to scream, "BALL!" and throw it. She didn't. She bit it.

And she kept biting it. She ate it!

And we rejoiced.

For dinner? We had salmon, fingerling potatoes and broccolini. We could count on Leif to eat the potatoes and broccolini while making up excuses not to eat the fish.

But we were really in awe of Skadi as she plowed through four stalks of broccolini and her potatoes as well as the one vegetable she normally eats (canned carrots).

It was like the produce button clicked in her head this evening and we are so very thrilled!

Now if the fruit snacks button will just click off. We are horribly tired of 20 minute tantrums when we decline her request for "more" while pointing at the fruit snacks.