A Conversation with a Seattle Starbucks Barista

Me: "I would like two kids chocolate milks with ice and whip."

Barista: "Do you want a flavor in those?"

Me: "A flavor?" (Thinking this is unique, I have never been asked about a flavor on chocolate milks before... would Leif drink a raspberry chocolate milk?)

Barista: (Looking at me like I am an idiot.) "Yes, a flavor, do you want a flavor in those."

Me: "Nope, just chocolate milks please."

Barista: "Then yes, you do want a flavor." (Rolls her eyes.)

Me: "You mean chocolate counts as a flavor in chocolate milk?"

Barista: "Yes, it does. Otherwise it would just be milk." (She says as she picks up two hot cups.)

Me: "Chocolate milks please, not hot cocoa."

Barista: (Doesn't pay attention.)

AB: "Why is she starting hot drinks?"

Me: (Shrugs.) "I have no idea."

Barista: (Rings up hot cocoas.)

Me: "If you are going to make those hot, would you make them 100 degrees please."

Barista: "Since it is a kids' drink we don't make them as hot."

Me: "I know that. I order a few a week during the winter, which is why I also know that my kids will whine if they aren't 100 degrees since you never listened to me the first time around when I said CHOCOLATE MILK WITH ICE!"

Barista: (Picks up the cups and writes a HUGE 100F on them and slams them to the counter. HUGE eye roll) "Anything else ma'am?"

Me: "A grande non-fat pumpkin spice please, two oatmeals with brown sugar only, a pumpkin loaf and a brewed coffee."

Any surprise that my latte was super heated, my oatmeals had everything BUT brown sugar? Of course how can you get back at me with pumpkin loaf and brewed coffee? Those were the only things I ordered that came as ordered.

I am a HUGE Starbucks fan. You kind of have to be in Washington state and especially given that we have a number of spots, even in our smallish town, where there are Starbucks in stores and freestanding on the same blocks. My kids know Starbucks and learned about Starbucks long before they ever learned about McDonalds.

Don't act like *I* am the stupid tourist who has no idea what I am ordering.

(Stepping off pedestal now.)