Shoe Girl Status in Question

Skadi loves her Keens. She has since she was a baby and she was just learning to walk in the summer after she turned one.

We each have our preferences, and while I want really badly to love Keens, they just don’t fit my feet well. Though I am thinking I might need to try their boots… maybe those would be better? Or maybe I am just sucked into thinking that by their adorable-ness…

Anyways, every year Skadi has had pink or purple Keens. Sandals or shoes. I asked Skadi earlier this summer what kind of shoes she wanted for the fall (in case I happened upon some clearance options) and she told me, “shoes like these” (pointing to her pink Keen sandals on her feet) “that don’t have have holes in them”.

Gee… there is a surprise… shoes like she has had for the last three years.

But then a few weeks ago she found an old pair of Leif’s Keens. His only pair. And Leif, like me, didn’t care for them on. They are brown size 10’s, the size she will need for the fall.

And Skadi has latched onto them. Her dad has latched onto Skadi loving them and 9 times out of 10 when dad is getting her ready in the morning those brown Keens grace her feet.

Can I be honest? I cringe a little. I know I shouldn’t. I shouldn’t cringe at my daughter wearing brown “boy shoes”. She is pink and frilly in everything else she does in life, a little bit of ordinary brown shoes won’t change that special something about her. Right?

I keep reminding myself that it is $50 saved. And that if one day this fall she adamantly decides that she doesn’t want the brown shoes anymore, we CAN go get her a pair of pink cute Keens.

Still though… this drastic out of character move of my daughter’s to latch onto something so… so… brown… and ordinary… just perplexes me.

And makes me a bit concerned about her status as a "shoe girl".

What I don't need...

I don’t need these shoes.

Nope, I don’t.

I just bought a chandelier for my dining room that is about the same price. My kids are going to need warm winter clothes here soon. I just bought two pairs of sandals on clearance. I do not, no not ever need this adorable pair of Danskos.

Normally I would be thoroughly intimidated by the heel. Except that I bought a pair of Dansko pumps… pumps that add a few inches to my height and therefore give me perceived legitimacy in begging for money in DC a few times a year. And a funny thing happened. I don’t just wear them on travel.

They are heels and they are comfy and I wear them nearly once a week. They have made me believe that heels can be done and have thus made these shoes appear to be within my grasp.

Nope, I don’t need these shoes.

I already have six or seven pairs of Danskos smiling at me in my closet. I don’t need another pair.

Plus, I really want a pair of boots…

But I don’t “need” those either.

Well maybe.

Oh, and while I am at it… my daughter definitely has no need for these:

"Let's go to the mall!"

Ok, so if you don't watch "How I Met Your Mother" that statement probably doesn't evoke as much imagery... see the gang finds out that their Canadian friend Robin was actually an 80's Canadian pop star...

Tonight we were contemplating dinner out. We ran through the very few options where we would willingly take our kids. Then AB tossed out the mall and added on "I know there have been a few things you have wanted to get there".

Yeah, for probably going on 6 weeks or so now. Just haven't made it there despite living right about a mile from the place.

I haven't been to our mall since reading Shampoo Planet by Douglas Coupland for book club. Shampoo Planet is based in the town we reside in. I really enjoyed the read as for me it was a testimony of reaching that "grown up" stage in the late 80's to early 90's. And what made it more fascinating to me was that the book was set here - in a time when I didn't live here. But was living a somewhat parallel life in a small city in Colorado. So not only could I relate to the characters of the book, but the scenery and that period of time. I have to admit though that reading the portions where they went to the mall evoked a sense of dread in me. A "so been there" dread that was too familiar thinking back to the Foothills Fashion Mall (now closed) as well as the mall I rely on locally.

Walking into the mall I immediately thought about where Tyler's girlfriend (yes, fictional character and all) may have worked and those kids hanging out in the food court.

Remember when it was cool to go to the mall? The security guards, who pretended to be much bigger shots than they actually were would try to exert some authority regarding loitering. I remember being dropped off and picked up at the mall by my parents with $10 (on a good day) in my hand. We might spend some time in the arcade, wander the toy store laughing at the toys we were much too old for now that we could go to the mall by ourselves, buy a big lemonade from Hot Dog on a Stick (giggle about those poor people in those awful outfits), buy some earrings at Claires, browse the music and wind up back at the front of the mall waiting to be picked up while rehashing which boys we saw (but never talked to).

I have become a little of an online shopping fiend in the last decade. It started with books at Amazon and has recently grown to whatever I can find that doesn't cost me much more or charge me a fortune to ship. I know... my city could use the tax income. But my time is short and gas is expensive.

Today it was my Merrell Plaza Mocs that I finally succumbed to along with a pair of Mary Jane Pedipeds for Skadi. I am blaming Rockergirrl because I did not go into work this morning with the intention of buying shoes and I need very little encouragement in this arena. But I got to browsing after she posted some of her favorites, then I got to "needing".

So I buy stuff online. However. I still refuse to buy my makeup online. I know I could order from Clinique somewhere... but if I did that I wouldn't get my Bonus Gifts and I wouldn't find out about new products (like the new powder I bought today).

And there are occasional mistakes I make buying online - particularly with Old Navy. That is about the only place I ever have to return things to. Best to just shop in store. For example, I was glad I actually went in and examined their little girl coats before buying online. We walked out of the mall this evening without a winter coat for Skadi and I am fighting MY need for her to have a cute girly coat when Leif's old Columbia coat and snow pants will do just fine.

We did however score pajamas for both kids, a pair of boots for Skadi (impulse buy), two dresses on sale from Children's Place, a few pairs of sweat pants for Leif, my make-up and dinner from Ivars.

I had thoughts of trying to avoid the mall for the Christmas season, then Leif started mentioning Santa Claus as we walked out.

That may have been the last time HE was at the mall.

The cherry on top

In between the annoying things, there are moments that top it all off.

We were getting in the car yesterday and Leif said to me, "mommy your hair is beautiful like that".

Awww.

The other exchange came today:

Leif: "Mommy what is that?"

NM: "It's my sewing machine."

Leif: "What's it do?"

NM: "I can make things. Like your favorite blanket. I made that with my sewing machine."

Leif: "Why are you putting it away mommy?"

NM: "I don't have time to sew lately anymore, so I am putting it up out of the way."

Leif: "But I love my blanket."

NM: "I know and I am so glad honey, but I am only putting the machine up."

Leif: "But I want another favorite blanket mommy, will you make me another blanket?"

NM: (I am SUCH a puchover.) "Of course sweety, we can go to the fabric store and you can pick out the fabric you want for a new blanket if you would like."

Leif: "Yay! Don't put away your machine mommy, I love my blankets."

Aww!

Skadi has a few new words. She signs a fair amount. (Must look on the board at school tomorrow and figure out the sign for "all done".) But she has three favorite words she uses all the time.

First one... "DADDY!" or "DADA!" Preferably screamed at the top of her little lungs. Last night she was in the backyard trying to hit the baseball off the tee and needed his help. He was inside and so she sat out there screaming, "DADDY! DADDY!"

She IS a daddy's girl.

Second one is "outside". Or as she says it "soutside". Skadi, like the rest of the family, loves to spend time soutside. She is getting the reputation at daycare as being an outside girl. She sees the bigger kids out and immediately will go to the window and start yelling "soutside!" Going outside will change her mood immediately from grumpy, to ecstatic. And she is so the second child, we don't follow her around the yard like we did Leif at this age. She goes out on her own, wanders around and usually brings in presents for me.

I hold out my hand when she requests and 90% of the time she deposits a bug in my hand.

Ick.

Third favorite word is "shoes". She pronounces it more like "shoos". She will fetch her shoes and sit herself down to put them on. She has her favorite shoes too. Out of all 14 or so pairs she has she will only wear one pair. Her blue Keens. The Primigi white sandals will suffice in a pinch, but forget her blue Crocs, or the birdy Robeez Treadz, or any of the other four pairs of soft soled Robeez.

So while she has her mommy's love for shoes, she doesn't covet the variety. She seems to be more like her daddy in the whole "give me one good, very comfortable pair of shoes that goes with everything and I am fine" philosophy.

Leif, otoh, likes choices and after finding no acceptable shoes at Famous Footwear. (I know, who am I kidding... it was convenient, I thought there might be something... I was wrong.) Leif came home and picked four pairs out online and they were narrowed down by daddy when mommy messed up and left the prices visible.

What has happened to me?

I used to buy shoes. A lot of shoes.

Over the last few years I have been purging my shoes. Not practical, too 90's, what was I thinking...

I am down to about twenty reliable pairs I either wear regularly or could envision myself wearing.

Ok, so maybe those two pairs of Doc Martins might not get a lot of wear - like ever, but I still love them. And so they are still in my closet. (I did actually wear the boots to work shortly after I started here and received more comments about my shoes than as a shoe girl, I was ever comfortable with. That's a lot.)

The past few years I have bought about one pair of shoes a year. And they have all been practical.

Last night my black pumps arrived from Zappos.

Love them. They really are cute and at just under $100, they work and bear a striking similarity to Cole Haan's Ambrose pumps I was coveting at $278. We are afterall, on a budget...

I wore them around the house getting used to them, making sure I didn't need to return and that I could walk in them today.

I could, just barely.

Leif comes up to me and looks at me, looks at my shoes and says, "did V bring those shoes over for you?"

I don't know what is more concerning, that my son doesn't know that *I* am a shoe girl too? Or that he has recognized and logged in his head what type of shoes V wears?